The Phuket Diary

Friday 2nd & Saturday 3rd July 2010

Its a long journey from Heathrow to Phuket. You travel to Bangkok which takes 11 hours and then you take an internal flight to Phuket which adds another hour or so to an exhausting trip. You need 2 weeks just to recover. I left Heathrow on Friday at 10pm British time and arrived eventually at Phuket Airport on Saturday 5.15pm Thai time.

My own private mini-bus was waiting for me which drove me an hour away to Amari Coral Beach Hotel, a 4 star resort located on the outskirts of Patong Beach. I was pleasantly surprised to have my room upgraded from a superior to a deluxe. My first impressions of my accommodation was that it was a well appointed room with all the luxurious that a 4 star hotel should be equipped with. I was further bowled over by the towel decoration of an elephant on the bed and the small buffet left for me on the coffee table. Full marks for the Amari for their customer service. The long flight with Eva Airways was now distant memory.

After quickly getting familiar with my surroundings and filling myself with the exotic spread laid on for me, I decided to take a bold step on my first night and venture down the infamous Patong Beach and in particular the notorious Bangla Road. It is good 20 minute walk from the hotel. This busy street late at night is something to behold.

I was propositioned at least a dozen times by so called lady boys (or I think they were). They were the most beautiful creatures - slim, refined with gorgeous breasts. You had to jolt your senses to remind yourself that these are Transsexuals both pre and post snip. Nonetheless they were wonderful to look at.

It seemed that there were all colours of the rainbow here on this small strip. Most were looking for some sort of action. As I guessed, there were a preponderance of middle-aged men who had seemed a long time ago to lose the will to exercise with their bulging waistlines. They were accompanied in most part by beautiful young Thai women who looked lovingly in their eyes and probably on their wallets. I suppose both get what they want - men get to have and hold attractive local girls and the women an escape from grinding poverty for security with an elderly European. In reality it's a fair compromise, a mutual contract which is never spoken about but everybody knows.

I ventured into a night club called Tiger. They are filled with 'working girls' aiming to be picked up by any man willing to pay for her drinks and to be taken back to the man's hotel for a price. If you are looking for a Mills and Boone romance in these pick-up joints forget it! What you have is a business transaction with a drop-dead gorgeous Thai girl for a night.

I myself was not tempted even though it is offered on silver plate with bells on. In truth you do not need to be George Clooney or Brad Pitt to get lucky. Men in their home countries who would have more chance of winning the Euro Jackpot than winning the hand of a beautiful fair maiden can with enough cash, in the Land of Smiles go out with an equivalent of an Angeline Joline.

You can see why single men (and more often married men) flock in their thousands to come here. Its a temptation hard to resist for most males. For me as an observer it was fascinating to watch.

I did not return to my crisp white blankets of my very comfortable king size bed until six in the morning. Crumbs it has been one hell of a first night in Phuket!!